How Does Self-Esteem Lead to Attracting Toxic Relationships?

How Does Self-Esteem Lead to Attracting Toxic Relationships? how does self-esteem lead to attracting toxic relationships?
Photo by Chela B. on Unsplash

Today, I’ll be addressing the question of how low self-esteem leads to staying in or attracting toxic relationships. Actually, what does it mean to have low self-esteem? When you have low self-esteem, it means that you view yourself as someone who is not worthy, someone with a low self-image, or someone without any value at all — like you’re worthless. So, when you view yourself that way, it means that in your life, you’ll be drawn to things or moving towards situations that confirm this belief or affirm this negative belief that you are unworthy or have no value.

One of those places you might be drawn to is a toxic relationship. In a toxic relationship, the abuser does things to you that genuinely make you feel unworthy. This could include physical abuse, verbal abuse, name-calling, or other actions that diminish your sense of self-worth. These actions align with the low self-esteem you have, creating a perfect environment for toxicity.

Another aspect of low self-esteem is feeling that your voice doesn’t matter. Dealing with someone toxic or abusive sometimes requires standing up for yourself, especially in the early stages of a relationship when manipulation begins. However, because you feel that your voice lacks value, you may not speak up, allowing the other person to continue their harmful actions. You may also not speak up or shout for help because deep inside you believe that no one will even listen to you.

Morever, when you have low self-esteem, seeking validation from external sources becomes common. This means that what others say or the superficial gestures they make can deeply impact you, especially in the early stages of a toxic relationship. The validation you receive, whether through words or gifts, may excite you, leading you to trust or believe that the person understands and loves you. This reliance on external validation stems from the emptiness you feel inside due to low self-esteem.

Low self-esteem also leads to staying in toxic relationships longer because you may not believe in your ability to handle challenges independently. For example, if you lack a job and have low self-esteem, you may not believe you can secure employment or attend interviews successfully. Consequently, you find yourself staying in the toxic relationship because you feel there’s no way out. You feel that for you to exist, you have to rely on someone or you have to rely on the relationship to get by.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.

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Edwin Bii
Edwin Bii

I'm Edwin Bii, a trained advanced conversational hypnotherapist (ACH) and Mind Shifting Coach from Kenya offering mental health support, and life coaching to help you crush your goalsand overcome your problems. Together, we'll navigate challenges, build self-awareness, and create a happier, healthier you. Let's unlock your potential.

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