Navigating Flight/Fight Mode After Abuse

Navigating Flight/Fight Mode After Abuse navigating flight/fight mode after abuse
Photo by Mario Heller on Unsplash

Why do you live in constant fight or flight mode after being in an abusive relationship? By constant fight and flight mode, I mean that you feel under attack, that you need to defend yourself, and that someone is out to get you. For example, even in a restaurant, if the waitress/waiter asks you for something, you react, feeling like you’ve done something wrong or they’re about to attack you. It’s a state of paranoia where you feel every moment that someone is out to get you.

The main reason for this constant state is that you’re not really living in the present moment. When you’ve been in an abusive relationship or experienced a traumatic past, you tend to live the present moment as a reaction to what happened to you in the past. You feel that every moment is not safe because your mind clings to the past, still holding onto the pain that has not been processed and is lodged in your subconscious mind.

Any moment you’re triggered, it’s like reliving a past painful experience in the present moment, causing your mind to be on high alert to protect you, even when there’s no immediate danger. For instance, if you’re alone in a room with no apparent danger, you may still feel uneasy because you haven’t dealt with your past. Small instances, like a fly passing by, can trigger you, reminding you of past painful experiences, and the emotions resurface in the present moment.

Living in fear or fight or flight mode without addressing the pain or traumas from your past keeps you feeling that everyone is out to get you. Even when someone offers help, you might feel they’re trying to manipulate you because you’re still looking at life from those lenses that experienced a traumatic past and you’ve never replaced them. True fear, like seeing a snake and running away, is legitimate, but when you’re not present and still living in the past, your fear is not legitimate; it’s a memory of a past fear, and that’s what trauma is all about.

To live more presently, work on processing these past fears and traumas. If you find yourself paranoid or scared for no apparent reason, it indicates there’s something you need to work on — your past traumas and healed wounds.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.

Share your love
Edwin Bii
Edwin Bii

I'm Edwin Bii, a trained advanced conversational hypnotherapist (ACH) and Mind Shifting Coach from Kenya offering mental health support, and life coaching to help you crush your goalsand overcome your problems. Together, we'll navigate challenges, build self-awareness, and create a happier, healthier you. Let's unlock your potential.

Articles: 844

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *