How Do You Stop Chasing a Relationship?

Let’s say you are attracted to a person, and you find yourself chasing them so much. You call them incessantly, question their whereabouts, and desperately want them to date you or stay with you, if you’re already dating. Also, when this person leaves, you end up chasing another person. So, for you, it’s all about chasing, chasing. How do you really stop chasing?

Actually, stopping chasing isn’t about finding someone who will keep you safe, as people often say. One common theme I’ve noticed in my interactions with friends is this idea that if they find that one person who won’t cheat on them or who will be there for them and shower them with everything, then they’ll stop chasing. However, it never really works that way.

When the urge to chase or to pursue a relationship is so strong, it often means that you are running away from something. When you’re constantly chasing after relationships or other desires, it indicates that you are discontented with your life in the present moment. Ending this chase isn’t about continuing to chase or finding different things to pursue. It’s about understanding why you’re seeking something outside of yourself, what about your life isn’t satisfying to the point that you desperately want something else.

This introspection reveals that perhaps you haven’t fully accepted yourself, maybe you’re lonely, or maybe you’re afraid of being alone or rejected. There’s something within you that you’re afraid of, whether it’s deep fears or patterns stuck in the subconscious part of your mind. Chasing becomes a way to avoid facing reality, your emptiness, or your loneliness. It’s not because chasing will make you feel better; rather, you’re chasing because you’re running away from yourself.

You might argue, “But every time I get what I’m chasing, I feel better.” Indeed, obtaining what you’re chasing can offer temporary relief and a sense of accomplishment. However, after a while, you may lose interest because the initial excitement fades, and you realize that you’re still not happy. No amount of acquisitions or pursuits will heal the wounds or address the fears deep within you. The only way forward is to investigate and inquire into the nature of your chase: Why are you chasing, and what are you running away from?

Once you confront these underlying issues, you’ll find that you no longer need to chase; you’ll simply be living. You’ll have your choice back — you can choose to be in a relationship or not. Healing gives you this choice. When you’re deeply content with yourself, you exude a calmness, even in the face of rejection or attractive prospects. You’ll realize that you’re not chasing because of lack but because you want to experience life.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.

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Edwin Bii
Edwin Bii

I'm Edwin Bii, a trained advanced conversational hypnotherapist (ACH) and Mind Shifting Coach from Kenya offering mental health support, and life coaching to help you crush your goalsand overcome your problems. Together, we'll navigate challenges, build self-awareness, and create a happier, healthier you. Let's unlock your potential.

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