Can Narcissistic Abuse Cause Narcissism?

Can Narcissistic Abuse Cause Narcissism? can narcissistic abuse cause narcissism?
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Today, I’d like to address a common question: “If I’m exhibiting narcissistic tendencies, is it possible that I’ll become a full-blown narcissist?”

This mostly happens when you’ve left a narcissistic relationship and then you start noticing that some of your behaviors are no aligned with your values. You might realize that you’re probably seeking excessive recognition and validation for your achievements. Or you might be exhibiting some manipulative behavior, such as blame-shifting. You blame others or constantly complain about things. Or you simply have a need for control over your environment or everything. You also struggle with accepting any form of criticism or are just very defensive. You react with anger, denial, or various other responses. So, you might conclude that maybe you’re actually becoming a narcissist because of these behaviors.

What happens is, it’s really hard for someone to become a full-blown narcissist after being in a narcissistic relationship because, in essence, these behaviors are ingrained from a young age. It’s as if you’ve been exposed to these behaviors for an extended period, to the point where they become a part of your identity. You’ve been in this state for so long that you may lack awareness of the abusive or narcissistic behaviors you’re engaging in, simply because you’ve been doing it for such a prolonged period.

For someone who has just exited such a relationship, that realization sets them apart from being a full-blown narcissist. However, it’s crucial not to get overly fixated on categorizing yourself as either a full-blown narcissist or just having narcissistic tendencies. That’s not the primary focus.

The crucial point lies in the initial recognition, the awareness that some of your behaviors are causing harm to others. This awareness marks the beginning of your journey. Whether you label yourself as a narcissist or not is secondary. Often, we become too entangled in fitting ourselves into these categories or labels. However, the awareness of these tendencies signifies that you are consciously or unconsciously causing harm to others, or will do so if you don’t work on improving your behaviors.

Rather than spending excessive time in forums or fixating on whether you are or will become a full-blown narcissist, focus on taking action to change your behavior. These behaviors have a significant impact on your relationships and mental well-being. Acknowledging that some of your behaviors are undesirable or in need of change is an essential step forward.

Unfortunately, sometimes awareness alone isn’t enough to prompt action. Many individuals become aware of their unhealthy behaviors but fail to take concrete steps to address them. Instead, they may conduct a brief Google search for answers and then return to their routines, essentially brushing off the issue. However, it’s crucial to recognize that this is where the difference lies.

What truly matters is not whether you have been diagnosed as a full-blown narcissist or if you have diagnosed yourself as such. What matters is your willingness to take action, to seek help, and to address the underlying issues that contribute to these behaviors. It’s about being proactive in confronting the beliefs and behaviors that you want to change. This willingness to embark on the journey of transformation is what distinguishes those who genuinely seek change from those who merely inquire without taking action. It’s not about endlessly questioning without taking steps forward; it’s about actively working towards growth and improvement.

When you realize that your behavior is harmful to yourself or others, that’s where your focus should be in. Instead of endlessly questioning whether you’ll become a narcissist, direct your energy towards addressing the behaviors that are causing harm.

Your mind may gravitate towards labels and justifications, but it’s important not to get stuck in this cycle. Whether you convince yourself that you won’t become a narcissist or accept that you will, either conclusion can lead to complacency. Believing you’re immune to change may prevent you from taking action, while accepting your fate as a narcissist may excuse further harmful behavior. Any answer you receive will likely reinforce your current state because your mind seeks justification to maintain the status quo. It’s accustomed to certain patterns of thinking and will actively search for external justifications to validate these patterns, thus keeping you stuck where you are. Your mind resists change because it prefers comfort over discomfort.

Instead of fixating on diagnosing yourself, focus on challenging your existing perceptions. Whether or not you receive a diagnosis, the key lies in questioning and challenging these perceptions. That’s where you’ll find the solution and pave the way for personal growth and transformation.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.

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Edwin Bii
Edwin Bii

I'm Edwin Bii, a trained advanced conversational hypnotherapist (ACH) and Mind Shifting Coach from Kenya offering mental health support, and life coaching to help you crush your goalsand overcome your problems. Together, we'll navigate challenges, build self-awareness, and create a happier, healthier you. Let's unlock your potential.

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