Narcissist Discard is a Blessing in Disguise

Narcissist Discard is a Blessing in Disguise narcissist discard is a blessing in disguise

Being in a relationship with a narcissist is a painful experience. They belittle, abuse, demean, and make you feel like you have no value at all. It’s a relationship where the best place to be is far away from them as much as possible. As we all know, the abuse cycle starts with idealization, then devaluation, and finally a discard phase where the narcissist finally leaves you after they’ve drained and depleted you emotionally, financially, or even physically.

The discard phase may seem cruel, but when we look at it from a different angle, it is a blessing in disguise. And yes, a narcissistic discard can be the best thing that happens to someone who is in a relationship with a narcissist. The narcissist discards you for a number of reasons, but the main ones are when they feel that you no longer offer them the supply they need or they’ve found a new source of supply.

The discard phase is a painful period, but in this article, we will explore why a Narcissist Discard can be one of the best things that ever happens to you in a Narcissistic Relationship.

  1. It forces you to realize the relationship is over.

One of the most common themes in an abusive relationship is the fact that we do cling to the idea that our partners will change and go back to the way they were early on in the idealization/grooming phase of the relationship. This forces someone to stay in the relationship, hoping and praying things will be better. A relationship with a narcissist is not a relationship at all; it’s just a dynamic that works well to feed the needs of the oppressor.

The discard is more of a wake-up call that there’s no need to wait for things to go back, and it’s now time to think of yourself and heal. The relationship was always over, but a discard reinforces the fact that it is now finally over and makes it much easier to accept and move on.

2. You now have time and space to heal.

A narcissistic discard is a very painful experience and is a huge blow to your self-confidence and self-esteem. The pain may be unbearable, but a discard will create an opportunity for someone to either seek help or work on themselves as that’s the only available option for the pain they’re feeling.

Yes, one may choose to suppress the pain they’re feeling, but a narcissist discard provides the space and time to heal away from the abuser. All this is not easy to achieve when you’re in the relationship as the narcissist occupies most of someone’s physical and mental time and space.

Hence, the discard provides the opportunity or forces someone to just do it even when they don’t feel like doing it, and in the long run, someone will find healing. The space and time will also mean that you can now focus on yourself, take care of yourself more, and this will just help with the healing.

3. It lessens the damage of the abuse.

Being in a narcissistic relationship is traumatizing, and the more you stay, the more they repeatedly abuse you, and the trauma goes from PTSD to CPTSD. A narcissistic discard means you’ve escaped from someone who’s made your life a living hell, and you’ve also avoided being retraumatized constantly, which lessens the emotional, physical, and mental effect of the narcissistic abuse.

It’s painful, but the more you stay, the more the trauma and pain become deep-rooted. So, a discard lessens the damage by ensuring the roots do not grow any farther. This will make it even much faster to uproot those subconscious patterns that have developed as a result of being in that kind of relationship.

4. A discard provides forced No-Contact.

Most times a narcissist discards you because they’re done with you, which means that for some period of time, they will not contact you or even look for you as they’re busy with their new supply elsewhere. This is the best part as it means you can ‘rest easy’ knowing that they will not be constantly trying to reach out to you. What better way to go ‘No-Contact’ than the Narcissist going ‘No-Contact’ or ghosting you? Of course, it is awful, but one of the main ways to find healing is going No-Contact, and it will be easy if the narcissist initiated the discard. I hope this explanation makes sense.


Even though the discard may seem like a cruel thing a narcissist does to you, it is, in fact, the best thing they can do for you. We can look at it as a compliment, and you can really now fully focus on rediscovering your true self and living that joyful life you deserve.

So, if you’ve been discarded, do not bow down, rejoice, and celebrate for you’ve been let off the hook by someone who’s drained you in all possible ways. I understand that it’s not easy to come to terms with this as it’s someone who you deeply cherished and loved, but that’s how it is. You will find peace in your life, and you will thrive as you’re finally free from their controlling and abusive behaviors.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns (in less than 2 months) , then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.

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Edwin Bii
Edwin Bii

I'm Edwin Bii, a trained advanced conversational hypnotherapist (ACH) and Mind Shifting Coach from Kenya offering mental health support, and life coaching to help you crush your goalsand overcome your problems. Together, we'll navigate challenges, build self-awareness, and create a happier, healthier you. Let's unlock your potential.

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