How do you manage to move on When Left with a Physical reminder of the Abuse?

How do you manage to move on When Left with a Physical reminder of the Abuse? how do you manage to move on when left with a physical reminder of the abuse?
Photo by Christopher Paul High on Unsplash

Today, I’ll be answering the question: How do you manage to move on when left with a physical reminder of what happened?

So, let’s first differentiate between actual physical injury and emotional injury, or a physical scar and an emotional scar. What happened is that the abusive person may have left a physical scar, right? A physical scar is a visible mark occurring on the physical level of your body. However, the real damage is more in the emotional scar. That scar is reminding you of that traumatic experience, and that’s what trauma is all about — trapped memories because of that past painful experience.

The pain is not really in the scar itself; the pain is in the memory of that past experience. It’s in the emotional scar, the psychological scars resulting from that experience where they hurt you or broke your leg. So, if you manage to work on clearing those traumatic memories or processing those emotional scars resulting from that experience, you will get to the point where you see the scar, and it will not take you back to the stuck emotions you haven’t processed from the past.

When you see the scar, it reminds you of the past. However, once you deal with the past and process those painful emotions tied to that scar, you just see the scar in the present moment. Healing is about dealing with the flashbacks and painful emotions triggered by the scar, and once you deal with those emotions, you can see the scar for what it is now, not for what happened to you in the past. Healing involves bringing yourself to the present moment, realizing that what happened in the past is in the past.

By dealing with the emotional and psychological scars, you can lessen the pain on the physical injury inflicted by the abuser. Also, you won’t be attaching the scar to who you are. When you see the scar, it should just remind you of the past, nothing more. Healing is about processing the painful emotions associated with that scar, so you can see it in the present moment without being tied to the past.

Therefore, healing means dealing with the psychological pain, those flashbacks and painful emotions tied to the scar. Once you heal the emotional pain, the only thing you may feel in the present moment is physical pain, which is just physical pain, like when you pinch yourself. Healing involves dealing with the psychological pain, and most of the time, once we address it, the pain from the scar lessens because we don’t interpret the scar through the lens of a past experience. We simply see the scar for what it is now.

The scar should not define you as a person or bring negative thoughts about yourself. It’s triggering something that hasn’t been processed. When there’s nothing to be triggered, you just see the scar for what it is. You can be present and compassionate with yourself for going through those things while acknowledging your resilience and strength. The narrative changes from the scar being caused by the narcissist and causing immense pain to acknowledging that you have the scar, but it doesn’t limit the way you live your life. You are resilient and can live life with scars because they don’t define you.

So, you can heal even if they broke your leg or gave you a black eye. Healing happens on the psychological level, and once you address that, you may start feeling less pain from the scar.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.

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Edwin Bii
Edwin Bii

I'm Edwin Bii, a trained advanced conversational hypnotherapist (ACH) and Mind Shifting Coach from Kenya offering mental health support, and life coaching to help you crush your goalsand overcome your problems. Together, we'll navigate challenges, build self-awareness, and create a happier, healthier you. Let's unlock your potential.

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