Why Do Narcissists Get Married?

Why Do Narcissists Get Married? why do narcissists get married?
Photo by Drew Coffman on Unsplash

It can be confusing why a narcissist would want to get married since they usually focus on themselves and find it hard to connect with others. They often avoid being close to people or committing to long-term relationships. But even with these contradictions, they still choose to marry and settle for ‘long-term’ relationships. Marriage is meant to encompass commitment, companionship, emotional closeness, growth, and trust — qualities that narcissists often struggle to honor. Being married to a narcissist can be a distressing experience because they enter into marriage for all the wrong reasons. So, why do narcs get married?

1. Stable Source of Supply

Marriage can indeed provide a stable source of supply for narcissists, and it serves as a way for them to fulfill their incessant need for admiration, attention, and validation. Within the confines of a marriage, the narcissist gains consistent access to their partner’s emotions, time, and energy, all of which they can use to bolster their fragile self-esteem. The spouse becomes a captive audience, providing a never-ending stream of attention and adoration that the narcissist craves.

Marriage provides an advantageous platform for narcissists because it is often perceived as a profound and unyielding commitment. Within this perceived framework of unwavering loyalty, narcissists can exploit the situation to their benefit. They can manipulate their partner and indulge in their self-centered desires without fearing the consequences of their actions. Moreover, the legal and customary protections that come with marriage can work in the narcissist’s favor, as they may exploit these safeguards to shield themselves from accountability or consequences for their harmful behaviors. People generally enter marriage with the belief that it is a strong and unbreakable bond, making it easier for the narcissist to exploit this perception to their advantage.


2. Reputation

In many societies, being unmarried can lead to judgment and disapproval from the elders and others. Narcissists are particularly concerned about their reputation and desire to portray a positive image to the world. Consequently, they choose to get married to create the appearance of stability in their life and relationships. By being married, they can present themselves as responsible and committed individuals, which aligns with the societal expectations of maturity and progress.

This facade allows narcissists to maintain their desired reputation and gain the admiration and approval they seek from others. Marriage serves as a strategic tool for the narcissist to project an image of stability and social acceptance, even if their true intentions may be far from genuine.

3. Fear of Abandonment

Narcissists are driven by deep-seated fears of abandonment and intense insecurities, which often play a significant role in their decision to get married. Despite their self-centered and seemingly confident exterior, narcissists harbor a fragile sense of self-worth and are terrified of being rejected or left alone. Marriage provides them with a sense of security and validation, as having a spouse can temporarily alleviate their abandonment anxieties.


4. Convenience

Narcissists may also get married for convenience rather than for genuine emotional connection or love. For them, marriage can serve as a means to an end, fulfilling their practical and self-serving needs. Some reasons why narcissists may view marriage as convenient include financial benefits and social status.

By being married, they may gain access to shared resources, financial stability, and social validation, all of which align with their desire for admiration and control. The convenience of marriage allows narcissists to maintain a façade of stability and respectability, which can be advantageous in certain social and professional circles.


In conclusion, it is essential not to enter into marriage with the expectation of changing someone. Pay attention to the early red flags that may surface in a relationship to protect yourself from potential emotional distress down the road. The key takeaway from these articles is to work on understanding and addressing your own vulnerabilities and insecurities. Whether you’re dating, hiding from, or running away from a relationship, it is crucial to acknowledge and explore the feelings that lie deep within you, even if they are difficult to put into words. Prioritizing self-awareness and personal growth can empower you to make healthier relationship choices and create a more fulfilling and emotionally balanced life.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these subconscious patterns for good (in less than 2 months) using Mind Shifting, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.


1. https://innertoxicrelief.com/why-narcissists-get-married/

2. https://unfilteredd.net/why-do-narcissists-get-married/

Share your love
Edwin Bii
Edwin Bii

I'm Edwin Bii, a trained advanced conversational hypnotherapist (ACH) and Mind Shifting Coach from Kenya offering mental health support, and life coaching to help you crush your goalsand overcome your problems. Together, we'll navigate challenges, build self-awareness, and create a happier, healthier you. Let's unlock your potential.

Articles: 838

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *