Have you ever sat down and really looked at what you believe about yourself or what you think you are? When you observe keenly, you’ll realize that you may not need years of therapy to resolve your problems—you may have simply developed that belief by taking what the experts say as absolute truth. And because you believe that as long as something is peer-reviewed or backed by studies—whether done on dogs, rats, or even humans—it must also apply to you.

How Beliefs Build on Beliefs

So, you end up developing beliefs based on other beliefs. The first belief might be, “Experts are always right,” which then builds into, “It will take me years to heal because the experts I trust said so.” That then becomes, “My trauma was so terrible that I’ll never overcome it—even studies have shown that.” And it keeps going on and on, adding a layer and layer of belief on top of the other.

Beliefs as Programs Reinforcing Themselves

See how beliefs build up and attract more beliefs that reinforce or solidify the current beliefs you have about yourself. Your beliefs are like programs that keep collecting episodes or events to confirm their existence. These episodes could be from the past or even happening right now.

The Filter of Trauma

So, if you believe that everything is traumatic, for example, a simple rejection in your present life could be interpreted by that belief as ‘trauma.’ Yep—when you’re rejected, say by that one person, and you’ve been holding onto the identity that rejection equals trauma, then you’ll automatically classify that event as trauma—because it aligns with the internal program you’re running.

Challenging Your Perspective

You won’t even challenge it or look at it from a different perspective, like: “Wait a minute—I was rejected by another person because they’re an individual, and I can’t control their choices.” That’s a completely different interpretation of the same situation.

But when you’re operating from ingrained or negative programs, they will almost always—and automatically—classify each new experience in a way that reinforces the existing belief.

Why Beliefs Keep You Stuck

That’s what really keeps you stuck in your healing journey—it’s those deeply rooted beliefs. You may have picked them up in childhood and even in adulthood, and over time, they were reinforced by events that occurred. That’s why you might truly believe they are who you are—they’ve become so ingrained that they feel like your identity.

Living Through the Filter of Beliefs

So, when you live life through the filter of these beliefs, you’ll end up choosing—or rather, you’ll be limited to—options that align with those inner programs or tapes playing in the background.

Why Positive Affirmations Alone Don’t Work

You may be asking yourself, “Where do I even start?” You might think it’s all about choosing positive beliefs or doing daily affirmations every morning. But nope—it doesn’t work that way. When your beliefs are deeply rooted and have been held for a long time, simply introducing positive beliefs through affirmations will often be outright rejected.Those positive beliefs might stick for a day or two—maybe right after you start your affirmation ritual—but soon, the old tapes will resurface. Why? Because that’s the familiar place your mind has gotten used to.

The Danger of Affirmations Without Deprogramming

Also, the danger of using positive affirmations on top of old tapes is that when they fail—and they often will—they can actually reinforce your negative beliefs. Why? Because the very tools you were told would work, didn’t. So when they fail, your negative beliefs will chime in: “We told you it wouldn’t work. Nothing ever works.” Or, “See? It takes time,” or even, “You’re just a failure.”

Your deeply held beliefs will interpret every situation through a negative lens—just to prove how ‘right’ they are.

The Solution: Challenging Old Beliefs

So, what’s the solution? It’s to challenge—and ultimately deprogram—those old beliefs that are currently running your life. It’s about understanding that, however uncomfortable it may feel, those old programs are not who you are. The real work is bringing those hidden programs into your conscious awareness, recognizing how they influence your current behaviours and habits, so that you can finally create space for new insights and perspectives to emerge.

An Analogy: Cleaning Your Inner Fish Tank

A good analogy I love using is this: it’s like cleaning a fish tank before introducing new fish. When you use positive affirmations without first dismantling your negative beliefs, it’s like adding healthy fish to a dirty tank—the new fish will eventually get infected.

But when you focus on deprogramming, you’re essentially cleaning the tank. You’re draining the murky water, scrubbing out the buildup, and then refilling it with clean, fresh water. Only then can your inner ecosystem function the way it’s meant to—clearly, calmly, and without dis-ease.

The Power of Awareness

If there’s one thing you can do for yourself, it’s to write down the beliefs or conclusions you’ve made about yourself. You don’t even have to do anything else—just become aware of them. You don’t need to flip them into positive ones right away, because your system may reject that. Simply write them down and observe what happens.

That alone is a powerful step. It’s a simple process of becoming aware of how those old tapes are currently shaping the way you see your life.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.