HOW HEALTHY BOUNDARIES WILL HELP YOU AVOID TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS how healthy boundaries will help you avoid toxic relationships

When you think of boundaries, what comes to mind? Boundaries are just limits we put in place to safeguard our well-being. These limits can either be physical or emotional. They outline what you are comfortable with, how you expect others to treat you, and vice versa.

Boundaries apply to any kind of relationship you have with family, friends, partners, or anyone in your life. Although we talk about boundaries in relation to other people, they’re, in fact, all about your relationship with yourself. Your boundaries represent your limits, identity, values, principles, and expectations that you develop to protect your mental, physical, and emotional well-being.

Having healthy boundaries means that you can express yourself authentically. Toxic relationships begin when our partners step on our boundaries. Toxic people ignore and trample on who we are, what we stand for, and what we won’t tolerate. In this article, we will talk about how having and maintaining healthy boundaries will keep you from being drawn into toxic relationships.

Firstly, having healthy boundaries will keep you from being taken advantage of. Toxic people love taking advantage and exploiting your caring and empathetic nature. When you have healthy and well-defined boundaries, you will easily spot and call out behaviors that are not okay with you. You will be intolerant of being treated badly and will not rationalize any toxic behavior.

Living in this state of awareness will mean that you will step back from a toxic situation and say ‘No’ with ease without feeling guilty as you are very clear on how someone needs to treat you. When you allow other people to exploit you, it ruins your self-worth. The more you stand your ground on what’s right for you and the more you say “No,” the lesser the likelihood of being drawn into toxic relationship patterns.

Secondly, having healthy boundaries improves our decision-making. With clearly defined boundaries, it means you know what you can’t stand, meaning that you will be basing your decisions on what’s best for you. You will choose to walk away or stay in a relationship without taking too long as you will have a baseline for arriving at the best decision. Healthy boundaries provide that emotional freedom from second-guessing yourself, meaning you can always make decisions that serve you. One of the most common reasons why we stay too long in toxic relationships is that we don’t have a baseline for deciding.

Without boundaries, we second-guess ourselves, and we get caught in the circle of, “Do I leave or Do I stay,” and this is because you’re not sure of how you deserve to be treated. Years of indecision will keep you in a toxic relationship, and this can just be corrected by simply knowing and honoring your personal boundaries. Once we know our boundaries, we will stop living a life of assumptions and make good decisions that keep us away from toxic relationship patterns.

Thirdly, having healthy boundaries implies that you’re choosing to take care of yourself, and this boosts your self-esteem and self-confidence. Boundaries safeguard the familiarity of your environment and the ability to operate in them with confidence.

Good boundaries are not restrictive but instead, they provide you with space where you can fully interact with others in ways that fully bring out your wholeness. To put it differently, well-defined boundaries are all about bringing your ‘A’ game in every interaction you have in your life.

This allows you to show up more assertively, authentically, and act with courage and honesty, which scares away toxic people around you. When you’re confident in yourself, you will voice your opinion and you will see through their manipulative tactics.

Lastly, personal boundaries will empower you to take personal responsibility and focus more on what’s within your control. Maintaining boundaries is like being the gatekeeper of your life to keep yourself emotionally safe and well.

Healthy boundaries mean that we know we’re only responsible for our own happiness and not someone else’s. It’s about accepting that every adult is responsible for their actions and emotions. Without them, you will end up being drained by someone who will never be grateful for what you offer. What draws us to toxic relationships is, at times, we feel that it’s our job to make others happy or to fix them.

Toxic people believe that they are entitled to do as they please, and their needs are far more important than ours. They love taking us for a ride by blaming us for things that happen in their lives. Firm boundaries will save us from this, as you will have an unshakable sense of reality since you are well-aware of what’s within your locus of control. In short, knowledge of your boundaries will keep you from being controlled and manipulated by a toxic person. It also ensures that we are not personally affected by their actions and behaviors.

That being said, healthy boundaries are great tools that help us avoid toxic relationships. Of course, maintaining them is easier said than done as it involves a lot of saying “No” to others, which can feel quite uncomfortable and selfish.

When we compromise on these boundaries, we’re inviting toxic people into our lives. Learning what your boundaries are and how to effectively communicate and uphold them will save you a world of trouble in your life. Do you know your boundaries? Share your thoughts and comments below.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns (in less than 2 months) , then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.

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Edwin Bii
Edwin Bii

I'm Edwin Bii, a trained advanced conversational hypnotherapist (ACH) and Mind Shifting Coach from Kenya offering mental health support, and life coaching to help you crush your goalsand overcome your problems. Together, we'll navigate challenges, build self-awareness, and create a happier, healthier you. Let's unlock your potential.

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