Healing Journey: Are you Addicted to Working on Yourself? Part 2

Healing Journey: Are you Addicted to Working on Yourself? Part 2 healing journey: are you addicted to working on yourself? part 2
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The Problem with Addiction to Self-Improvement

That’s what it looks like when you’re truly hooked on self-improvement. Been there, done that. I was so caught up in it that I’d get upset if I missed my morning meditation because I was spending time with friends or family. It feels like you’re chasing something big, like enlightenment or whatever. You might even consider quitting your job to meditate in the mountains all day. But is that really the answer? It’s like a double-edged sword.

When you find yourself stuck in a toxic relationship or addicted to something, it usually means there’s an underlying addiction issue. You can even become addicted to self-improvement activities, but it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re growing as a person. It just shows that addictive behavior is still part of who you are or of how you perceive yourself.

Your object of addiction can be self-improvement, so it’s the instance where the content of addiction changes to something seemingly beautiful, but the structure (your identity or your addictive or your compulsive nature) remains. So, despite engaging in positive activities, you’re not really changing — you’re just masking the addiction with something attractive. It can be deceiving because instead of realizing you’re not making progress, you might convince yourself you’re on the right path. It’s like having beautiful roses tied to chains. Eventually, you might realize you’ve been doing this for years without feeling any better. That’s when seeking help becomes necessary.

You end up thinking that now you ‘understand’ the subconscious and conscious mind, all those meditations, all those types of therapies. You now are in the state of knowing, and nothing is as deceptive as knowing. When you know, you will not seek help from third parties. You will not seek an opinion from that party. And the ego (or the self you’re improving or feeding) loves that. The ego is telling you, “Ah, what’s the point of going for therapy if you know, like you’ve been studying these books for 40 years?”

In fact, one of my fellow therapists shared an experience where he worked with a client who had been practicing meditation for 40 years. After a session with them, the client expressed, “I’ve been practicing meditation for 40 years, but I’ve never felt this lighter, and I’ve never reached this state.”

This happens because meditation, while intended to bring freedom and clarity, can sometimes morph into an addiction or a protective mechanism. Instead of helping you progress, it can keep you trapped in your current state or identity. It’s like being stuck in a loop where you’re not truly addressing the underlying issues. So, in essence, it becomes contradictory because the very practice meant to liberate you ends up keeping you stagnant. That’s the problem with approaching these aspects sometimes by yourself.

Basically, our minds are pretty good at finding things that make us feel good or distract us, even if they don’t actually help us grow or change. It’s just how we’re wired — we tend to stick with what we know and what feels safe, rather than facing the challenges that come with trying something new.

Take a Break from Self-Improvement to Improve

Taking a break from self-improvement activities, like reading books or doing meditation, can be eye-opening. Sometimes, we get so caught up in these practices that we lose sight of ourselves. By taking a break, even just for a week, you might notice feelings of anxiety, sadness, or loneliness creeping in. Instead of pushing these feelings away, try observing them without judgment. This can help you become more aware of what’s really going on inside you.

https://toxicrelationships.medium.com/healing-story-3-beth-when-you-are-anxious-and-cant-stop-second-guessing-yourself-c57d2aab5233

Sometimes, we realize that our efforts to improve ourselves might actually be masking deeper fears or avoiding facing difficult emotions. Self-improvement can be great, but it can also become addictive, making it hard to see beyond it. That’s why therapy is so valuable. A therapist can provide an outside perspective, calling out patterns or behaviors we might not notice ourselves. They challenge us to confront our issues directly, rather than relying on coping mechanisms. It’s important to address our problems head-on instead of just covering them up with quick fixes or instead of waiting or looking forward to the next spiritual retreat.

In conclusion, while all these self-improvement techniques and practices are necessary and amazing, you need to be watchful if they’re helping you to sleep instead of waking you up. Sometimes it’s necessary to have an intervention of therapy to help you challenge your patterns before you entertain your unconscious patterns with self-improvement. Hope you found this interesting, guys. Let me know about some of the self-improvement techniques you’re using, and also let me know once you take a break from them and see how it goes. That’s how you see the nakedness beyond all these tools or this addiction.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.

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Edwin Bii
Edwin Bii

I'm Edwin Bii, a trained advanced conversational hypnotherapist (ACH) and Mind Shifting Coach from Kenya offering mental health support, and life coaching to help you crush your goalsand overcome your problems. Together, we'll navigate challenges, build self-awareness, and create a happier, healthier you. Let's unlock your potential.

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